The Poorly-Read Librarian

A few weeks ago I felt the need to drive nearly 6 hours to Washington Depot, CT and see the town that inspired Gilmore Girls' "Stars Hollow". Of course I had to request off work, wait 3 weeks for those scheduled days to arrive, and hope that I still felt adventurous. It seemed to work out nicely since Utah didn't happen and with this weekend's events, I needed a break from life right about now anyway. I chose a hotel in the Danbury/Bethel area of Connecticut which is only 20+ miles from my dream destination, but once I got there, my desire to see "Stars Hollow" waned and I didn't feel like driving an extra 40 minutes out of my way. I figure, you see one New England town, you've seen them all. I'm sure that's an incorrect assumption; I'll have to adjust my worldview for next time. I did, however, enjoy these two days of scheduled spontaneity. In honor of at least one favorite TV show, I spent a "scrantastic" 20 mi...

Surprise event of the weekend: My newest niece was born Saturday morning at 5:41, and guess when she was due - November 5th. Just in case you're confused or a little out of touch, Saturday was not November 5th. It was, in fact, October 17th, meaning she was in such a hurry to reach the world that she came three weeks early! Crazy kid. Needless to say, she's tiny. 4 pounds, 11 ounces kind of tiny. But, she is absolutely beautiful and has one heck of a big sister: "Psy'renee Alayna Dennis" - I'm pretty sure her name is bigger than she is. Paris holding her baby sister's hand. Tender. Paris told Psy (pronounced 'sigh', as in psychology, psychotic, psychiatrist, etc): "It's going to be alright." I almost cried, it was that adorable. Paris holding her sister for the first time... ...and Paris being distracted by a Barbie commercial on the TV above her. Paris found an awesome hiding place for her solo game of hide-and-seek. Lo...

I'm done being stubborn. I'm doing being selfish. I'm done being needlessly apathetic. I hope that f.y.e. will make it without my business this week. I don't have the money to shop anyway, and my dad's health is infinitely more important than a used copy of The Office. There is the whole "non-refundable" aspect of traveling to consider, but apparently the powers that be were willing to overlook it this time. Dad was able to cancel everything (flight, hotel(s), rental car) without a significant monetary loss. I think that was part of my selfish concern, even though I wasn't paying for the trip anyway. I truly was prepared to grab Paris and go - I like to think we could have survived a trip to Utah and back together. However, I would've felt like a callous jerk if I went, but I'd rather not sit at home when I could be elsewhere, so here's hoping Walmart lets me work when I'm not scheduled...

So, my dad is in the hospital and I probably should be more concerned than I feel like I am. But I think I may actually be more concerned than I can handle, so I shut down my senses instead and not-so-subconsciously decide not to handle it at all. The trip to Utah that I was so looking forward to and that was supposed to take place this week is, obviously, no longer happening. And you know what upsets me the most? I won't be able to shop at f.y.e. like I planned. You think I'm kidding. Nope. I am as heartless as they come. I am a spoiled little child who didn't get a pony for her birthday and may actually throw a temper tantrum because of it. Paris, my 3-year-old niece who was going to fly on an airplane for the first time and see her cousin Kora's house also for the first time, is handling this better than I am. Apparently, hospitalization, in my mind, is no excuse to cancel a trip. I'm a jerk. My "suck it up and deal with it" mentality just i...